A Year of Boudoir: A Journey Through My Eyes to Yours
My assistant, Kaitlyn, invited me to capture a personal moment in her life, her husband Daniel's return home after being deployed nearly a year. I asked her if she would share not only the video, but how her first year in boudoir has empowered her. And after you read this blog, check out her testimonial about how her first photoshoot helped her stay connected when the two were apart.
And now in Kaitlyn's words, what her first year as my boudoir assistant has meant to her...
As I reflect back on the past year, I can't help but look back on who I was and who I have become. How this gift I decided to give would change the very core of who I am. Here's to the journey from my eyes to yours.
"A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms." - Unknown
There was a time in my life that I wouldn't, maybe even couldn't "just bloom." A compliment to the girl next to me meant a cut down to me… why didn't i get that compliment, what's wrong with me? What was my problem, why did I have this innate desire to compete with other women? Did I have some sort of vendetta against the beautiful women of the world or was it as simple as something that lied within me...? Could I "just bloom?"
Learning my husband was going to be deployed for most of last year, I wanted to give him a Christmas gift that he would never expect, boudoir photos. I was so excited to get the pictures done.... I can be sexy, will I be sexy, wait, can I be sexy? I made the choice, I am going to do a boudoir photo shoot. I find For Your Eyes Boudoir Photography by searching the web, contact Ben and felt good with my choice; I knew this was who I want to use. What I did not know was that after doing this shoot, things would begin to change in me. The experience of my first shoot became a gift not only for my husband, but me as well. Seeing my husband look at those photos, hearing him talk about them, not only could I see the things he was saying but I felt them. I found so much empowerment from this experience and wanted to be a part of it anyway I could.
At first, I thought I would do boudoir shoots throughout the year to randomly send his way. Then the opportunity of becoming an assistant for For Your Eyes Boudoir Photography presented itself. Not only was I able to do shoots throughout this year but I gained so much more. As time went on, I continued to change. I could look at these women and uplift them, I wanted to empower them. I saw beauty in each of them, without cutting myself down or taking away from myself. I could genuinely and honestly tell these women how beautiful they are and find joy from it. By being a part of uplifting others, helping others to find their beauty, their sexiness, and their confidence, I found mine. I could call myself beautiful without shame or vanity. I am confident in who I am and my body. I am sexy. I dropped barriers and walls that I had up due to insecurities. As I was discovering this woman I wanted to be, I, for the first time, truly heard my husband's complements and accepted them. To be able to actually hear him tell me that I am beautiful and not doubt the compliment is truly a gift for both my husband and I.
I have had times of growth through this journey of boudoir, I have found myself and I hope I continue to challenge myself to evolve. Each photo taken, each photo shoot assisted, every time ounce of support given, every woman empowered; a strong, confident woman who has accepted her "flaws" as beauty, who does not need compete with other women but uplift them was created. And my husband came home to a brighter flower who learned how to bloom!